Last week I shared with you that I’ve been a bit stubborn about my food allergies. So stubborn in fact that after I wrote that post my mind reasoned that maybe giving up the foods was enough, surely coffee was not causing me any problems. I mean it’s one thing to be allergic to carrots and accept that you won’t be eating the crunchy guys anymore, it’s another thing completely to give up something you dream about.

I love coffee so much that I found myself at night thinking about how excited I was to wake up the next morning and make myself those lovely little shots. Would I add three to my drink that morning or four? Would I space it out and have two drinks – 3 shots in one and 2 shots in another? Good thing Eric doesn’t work from home, I would think OR he would surely tell me this much caffeine isn’t good for me. Oh but I needed it. Needed it. It’s how I got through the day every day. How else can you run 8 miles, do a strength workout, throw in a little yoga, clean your house, keep up with your kids and not crash at 5 pm. YEP, needed it.

Sharing this makes me feel vulnerable. Vulnerable to being judged at how I treat my body.

So that day I gave up the foods I shared with you – nuts, carrots, green peas, chocolate {sigh}, and mustard. Other than accidentally eating a bite of a Kind Snacks Blueberry Breakfast bar yesterday, that I didn’t realize had almonds in it {hello reading comprehension}, I haven’t eaten any of those foods. I also realized after eating half a bag of snap peas that every time I eat snap peas I feel like I’m going to throw up. Yet again, my mind tried to reason it’s way out of it and say NOOOO it’s not the snap peas. And yes, you are probably thinking, well DUH Dorothy, there are peas in snap peas. 

I did not however give up coffee that day. I reasoned, I’ll start tomorrow. Tomorrow came and I reasoned, how am I going to make it through the day with out it. Then the next day came and I beat myself up inside. I shared my struggle because I wanted accountability only I wasn’t being accountable to you or myself. So I quit. I cleaned the Nespresso and put it on the highest shelf in my pantry, where I don’t see it every day. I moved all my containers and boxes of tea to where I would see them every day. It hasn’t been easy but cold turkey is the only thing that works for me. I’m not a moderation type person.

Despite over eating this weekend, I have woken up every morning to a completely flat stomach and the swelling in my face is going down. The reason I tell you this is not to brag and be all look at me, I have a flat stomach yay – I’m telling you because for years I have not understood why I worked so hard at looking fit yet I always felt there was this uncomfortable layer surrounding me. I’m convinced it was food. Not because of overeating BUT what I was eating. For a period of time it was hard to wrap my head around the fact that foods that are healthy {such as carrots}, were doing more harm than good – I think my mind fully “gets it” now.

I’m missing coffee BUT I feel good. If it truly was those foods and coffee contributing to my stomach issues and feeling swollen then I’m fine now with them no longer being a part of my diet. I’ve accepted it.

Accountability is a wonderful thing.

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As for those foods contributing to my dizziness. My doctor doesn’t think they are the cause! I’ll share tomorrow what she thinks it is and the changes I’ve made. Fingers crossed it’s as simple as she thinks it is.

I haven’t gotten dizzy since the race and for that I’m REALLY thankful.

I’m committed to not getting in the way of my health.

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