Do you ever have those days when you NEED to run? As in you really NEED to run. Not the type of need to because it’s on the schedule or the I haven’t run in 3 days but the type of run that is the ONE and only cure for your mental health at that moment?
Last week I was starting to feel down on myself. I know, I know. It’s silly. I just had a baby. My mind knows that but some days it has a hard time wrapping itself around the concept that my fitness is not what it was exactly a year ago, that my weight is higher, my patience lower, and time for myself diminishing. I NEEDED to run. I wrote hubby and told him I was starting to feel bad about myself and that I needed to run when he got home. He understood.
I was dressed and waiting when he arrived. I waited till he was settled and headed out the door for an easy run. Part way into the run I decided I needed a confidence booster. I was going to attempt another sub 8 minute mile. I knew it could go either way. I could go sub 8 and feel great about myself or I could struggle and possibly feel even worse. Mile 4 ended up being sub 8 and I hadn’t even tried to push myself.
Okay Dorothy you got this. Try for sub 7. What’s the worst that could happen? You don’t do it? Who cares, you had a baby 7 weeks ago – just try.
Try I did. Mile 5 of my 5 miler I pushed it and pushed it hard. 6:42 As I did a .25 cool down on the way back to my house I felt renewed. Did I really just do that? Did this girl who less than 11 years ago was an overweight, smoker(gasp), who could barely run an 11 minute mile just run a 6:42 less than 8 weeks after giving birth to her 3rd baby? OH YES SHE DID.
It gave me hope for the future and confirmed in my head that I will again one day run what I consider to be fast. Three kids will not be the end of Dorothy-the-wanna-be-fast-mommy-runner. I will achieve my goals. I won’t let diapers, wipes, spit up, and sleepless nights hold me down. I won’t make excuses as to why I didn’t achieve all I wanted to achieve in my life. I will grab life.
I will live it to the fullest.