To say I’m tired is an understatement.  I’m mentally exhausted for a variety of reasons.

What do I do when the going gets tough?  Quit?

NO. I fight.

I used to be the girl that complained ALL the time about this and that.  The girl who hit an obstacle in the road and gave up.  I’m not her anymore.

I want what I want in life so bad that I’m willing to do what it takes. 

It takes patience, determination, and occasionally a lack of sleep. It takes hard work with a little elbow grease and heart, allot heart.

Last week my husband had training for work, which meant that he left around 5:30 am and didn’t get back home till around 6:30 pm.  Despite being exhausted I pushed through and ran 50 miles for the week[12 weeks postpartum].  The most I’ve run since baby C was born and only 5 miles off of my all time high of 55.  I did a tempo mid week with 3 tempo miles and hit all of them at a 7:03 pace.  I had a fantastic 18 miler on Saturday followed by a double stroller shake out run on Sunday with Chloe and Miles in tow.  The pace I kept while pushing them made me feel strong.  9:34/8:59/8:58/8:46/8:51

With God everything is possible – Matthew 19:26

My routine for the past 5 months has included getting up at 6 am or earlier to get my daughter ready for school and on the bus.  For various reason I now I have to drive her to school, which means not only getting her ready for school but now getting myself and my two other sons ready for the drive. It will take time to adapt to our new routine, but I have no fear that it won’t soon become a routine.

I knew this week would be a step back in mileage week because of the new challenge I was presented but I would not let that discourage me.  I would welcome the rest.

This morning I was tired after being in the car for an hour. I wanted to run, but I didn’t want to run.  I needed to do a tempo, but I didn’t want to do a tempo.  I procrastinated but finally got on the treadmill.  At 6.5 speed I felt I was going my top speed.  You can do this Dorothy. You are a fighter.

When I feel weak, I push myself.  This helps me gain strength.  I wanted to make the jump from 3 tempo miles to 4 this week.  How would I do that if I was tired?  Arg.

I turned on CSI to get me through the run.  During the 1st tempo mile when I wanted to give up – I saw a number.  4/18 – it was the birth date of the woman they had in custody who was accused of murder.  It also happens to be the date of Boston this year.  A SIGN.  Boston.  How bad do you want it?

I heard Tim McGraw singing in my head.

How bad do you want it?

How bad do you need it?
Are you eating, sleeping, dreaming
With that one thing on your mind?
How bad do you want it?
How bad do you need it?
Cause if you want it all
You’ve got to lay it all out on the line

I knew I would not give up today.  4 tempo miles – 7:03 pace.  I feel stronger.

Comments

  1. Awesome!

  2. Karen the "Hungry Mom" says:

    that is a great tempo! congrats on a 50 mile week even amidst all that is going on. i have no doubt you are going to kick butt at national.

  3. solid tempo run today! stay hungry.

  4. I was thinking of you today- Trying to push out a total of 18 miles today on the 'mill..Working tomorrow night and all day Sunday, so this will be my "long run" for the week. You are absolutely right- keep on fighting, don't give up! Even when you would much rather curl up with a great book on the couch. 😉

  5. I received your package today, thank you so very much!

  6. Amanda@runninghood says:

    Nice job Dorothy. It must have been your blog that inspired me in my workout last night. :) I am always so tired getting to the gym at almost 8p.m after a long day with 3 kids. Last night was supposed to be 5 miles at base pace (7:50ish) but I threw in mile 2 and 3 at 7:03 pace. Felt awesome! Definitely feel stronger. :) I meant to comment on this yesterday but got distracted…looks like your blog served at least one purpose…it inspired me and got me going!

  7. Nicole Wagner says:

    I love this post! I say all those same things to myself and I agree, If you want it, you have to do what it takes to get it! My motto/mantra has always been "how bad do you want it Nicole?". I love that. I feel like I have a lot in common with how you think, your determination and your motivation:):) now I can tell my husband that I'm not the only one out there;) lol..I'm kidding. but really he thinks I'm crazy and I try to tell him that there are other women out there that are as obsessed with running fast as I am:):)

I love a good comment!

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